“I thought about the sturdy rose in my heart
about the useless soul like a sieve
but the keeper asked:
who will gain the upper hand
I said: saving the skin
he shouted: the skin is
nothing but a scrap of insulted batiste
with no common sense
collagen by Herta Muller
translated by Philip Boehm
itsn’t my life a celebration of weakness
David Horvitz - Sad, Depressed People (published 2012)
"A set of found images from a stock library in which people are portrayed holding their heads in their hands. The book explores a bizarre tension between the status of these photographs as stock images and their supposedly emotional, depressed content.”
not very often, but now you do make-ups to cover your corpse-like face. watch your conducts, girl, for its impossible to organize your random thinking and messed-up feelings. watch your steps for there are consequence to bear. you dont want to disappoint. dont lick your wounds. if you know you would shed tears just by thinking of it, dont think of it. we all carry our own cross. you have created all those tensions and struggles to displace yourself, but you know it is out of anxiety, and it is no good for health.
if fantasy is a matter of role-playing, i am living the fantasy.
"the trees, like lungs, filling with air"
by Paul Celan
What did I
Seminated the night, as though
there could be others, more nocturnal than
Bird flight, stone flight, a thousand
described routes. Glances,
purloined and plucked. The sea,
tasted, drunk away, dreamed away. An hour
soul-eclipsed. The next, an autumn light,
offered up to a blind
feeling which came that way. Others, many,
with no place but their own heavy centres: glimpsed and avoided.
Erratic boulders, stars,
black, full of language: named
after an oath which silence annulled.
And once (when? that too is forgotten):
felt the barb
where my pulse dared the counter-beat.
(“but no one ever presses my button,” says lisa rowe from girl, interrupted)
“你讓我想起直子,” 一個新認識的朋友這樣對我說。然後我就驚慌起來，走向她。她安慰我說，”no, you are much stronger than she was.”
be it a curse or not, i am so much stronger and luckier. promise thyself, dont be a tumor. fitter happier. be productive.